Shitty Things You Say and Do Part Two

  1. Don’t listen the first time: “It comes with a small house salad on the side or you can upgrade to a ceasar or greek salad for $3.” “Yeah I’ll have the french fries.” NO
  2. When you decide to sit at the bar but pull out three chairs for no reason.
  3. “Food and drinks are listed in the menu in front of you.” “Can I look at a food menu?” URG
  4. Orders a pop and food item. Gets a phone call and leaves, paying only for the pop. Wtf?
  5. “We’re in a rush.” Proceeds to sit at table for an hour.
  6. Allowing your shitty kids to draw all over the table
  7. Expecting free food when your prementioned shitty kid throws theirs on the ground.
  8. Expecting free beer because you frequent a bar often. Like no, you’re still a customer and we are still a business.
  9. “So I’m going to order this wrap, but change everything about it to match what I actually wanna eat.” OMG go to Subway then.
  10. “Can I get you something to drink?” “No thank you” “Water?” “Yes please and a Pepsi.” THOSE ARE DRINKS!!
  11. Dining and dashing…dick move guys…dick move.
  12. Lying about driving after you drank that one too many. Also a dick move. Don’t do it. DON’T!
  13. “Can we get two beers to go?”
    “No sir, that is illegal.”
    “Oh. Can we have a pitcher and sit on the patio?”
    Proceeds to pour pitcher into a milk jog and put it in their car. All on camera.
    Cops: “You’re on camera doing this sir.”
    “No I’m not.”